Friday, February 22, 2013

Adventures of Supermom: Pluses and Minuses of Staying Home with my Kids

Happy Friday, all!

After our usual morning routine was over: waking, changing, feeding, cleaning - I opened the shades and plopped down in my "mama chair" with a semi-hot cup of coffee. With "Snow Storm Q" passing through, I thought I would check and see how my husband's commute was this morning.

Not to my surprise, the Fridley Patch commute update page showed the traffic radar looking like this:

Photo Credit // Fridley Patch
My first thought was, "Holy crap, it must have taken Pete two hours to get to work today!". My second thought was, "Holy crap, I am so glad I don't have to go anywhere today!".

While I was in semi-gloat state mode about not having to leave my cozy 73 degree house, I thought, "Crap, I am stuck in the house all day!".

It is a great feeling to know I hardly ever have to pack up the kids and take them anywhere if I don't want or have to. However, spending a glorious 12 hour day with no help, in the same house, can at any moment become not so glorious.

There are pluses and minuses to every profession. Someone might have a job where they make a million dollars, but in exchange for the money they may never get to see their family. That is just an example.

As a stay-at-home mom, I get the luxury of staying home all day, every day with my fabulous kids. In exchange for that time with my kids I, well - I have to spend all day, every day with my kids!

Any mom or dad would know the double edge sword of the time we spend with our kids. I often find myself teary eyed over the beauty of the little things, like, "I love you, mom", a great trip out, learning, pajama time, special treats, or helping out. However, I also get the everlasting joy of tantrums, refusing to eat, poopy diapers, crabbiness, and mess making.

Those treats are just for starters.

I can tell you without hesitation, I am a super mom. Actually, I am Supermom.

Superman (or Superwoman for the PC readers):
1. A man with more than human powers.
2. An ideal superior man who, according to Nietzsche, forgoes transient pleasure, exercises creative power, lives at a level of experience beyond standards of good and evil, and is the goal of human evolution.

Now, we could get into a philosophical (or theatrical for my Shaw people) discussion, but that is a cup of tea for my Nietzsche-freak husband.

No where in the "definition" of Superman do you see the word perfect, right?

Why do I think I am Supermom? I don't think I am superior, but I do it all in our home and in return I get the simple satisfaction of knowing I did it all. While, I feel like I spend the entire day holding my breath, I try my best to do everything I can for the betterment of my family. That is my primary job.

My husband and I have a semi-unspoken agreement that I take care of everything in the house, including the kids, and he takes care of everything outside of the house. There are plenty of days neither of us wants to do our jobs, but it beats having to decided who has to do what around here. We just know what we have to do, whether we like it or not!

I: am Supermom, cook, clean, shop, make appointments, chauffeur, launder, plan parties, make trips to see family members, and so much more.

My husband: works (12 hours days nonetheless), mows the lawn, takes the garbage to the curb, pays bills, fixes things that are broken, fills the cars with gas (yes, even mine!), maintains the garage, and so much more. On top of these things, he has to come home to crazy-house and be Superdad. On occasion I make him be Superhusband, but that is an entirely different post!

I don't claim to have a life much different than anyone else. As a parent, we work our tails off to make or children and the people around us happy. Whether we are staying home or working, the sacrifices we make are small when we can be assured all of our needs (and our children's) are met and then some.

Ok, let's lighten this post up a little bit here. Here are a few good examples of how being a stay-at-home supermom can have pluses or minuses:

Plus: I don't have to pack up my kids to go anywhere if I don't want to.
Minus: We often get stuck in the house due to: winter storms, tantrums, feeding schedules, ect.

Plus: I have the time to keep a tidy house.
Minus: It takes all day to keep it tidy with my little boys.

Plus: I don't have worry about when the lawn will get mowed.
Minus: If I have to unload the dishwasher one more time today, I might go insane.

Plus: Our fridge is golden.
Minus: I have to coordinate meals far in advance to avoid multiple grocery trips.

Plus: My kids eat very well.
Minus: I cook 3 meals a day.

Plus: I get the advantages of going to popular outings during the day like play lands, and they are never busy.
Minus: I have to chase the kids around by myself.

Plus: I get two hours of alone time when my kids nap.
Minus: This is when I take a shower, do cleaning projects, or work on blog posts. (Ok, ok I do nap, sometimes!)

Plus: I can go to Target whenever I want.
Minus: As a 12 hour mom of 2, I rarely get to go anywhere by myself.

Plus: My kids can come to me anytime during the day, and I am there for them.
Minus: Mom doesn't get sick days.

Plus: I get to do all the shopping.
Minus: Budget 2013.

Hopefully, my pluses and minuses don't sound too depressing! In the scheme of things, I love my life at home. In the same way, a lot of mothers enjoy their work outside the home. We all get sick of it from time to time, but hopefully, we are all doing what we chose to do.

Do you have any funny pluses and minuses about your life? Anything you would change, if you could?


  1. This nails it, MB! I think that calling out the pluses and minuses together puts it in perspective. No situation is perfect, but I love that you are working so hard on accepting and loving yours. As a former corporate full-time, gone for 10 or 11 hours a day mom, to a part-time mostly work from home mom with at least one day a week fully devoted to my son, I can honestly say that being home is not easy and being at work full-time is not easy. Being home is not terrible and working full-time is not terrible. There are just positives and negatives to both. Please note that I do not have experience being home full-time and I'm not sure if I'd be good at it, but my point is that the grass is always greener. Love that you acknowledge the positive and the negative.

    p.s. Longest comment in the history of Occupation Housewife? I think so!

    1. Rest assured, I look forward to the longest comment in history - especially, coming from an awesome work-a-stay-at-home-mama like yourself.

      I am super blessed to have just fallen into my choice to stay at home and have it work for me. I really admire your courage to try everything and make it work for you and your family!

      I hope you are happier now in your situation than ever before!

      As a fellow Supermom yourself, the "grass is greener" is such a good description of our days!



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